Q: What Happens When You Die?

A: You will become vaguely disturbed and irritated at the way people remember you. You will wish to correct all their imperceptive blunders, but unfortunately your friends were never gifted with the sixth sense (i.e., they will detect your fortissimo corrections less than the people of Troy detected the innards of the Trojan Horse). Their mutilations of your memory will be there to stay.